The Ability to Observe without Evaluating

Each time we engage with the world, we interpret it through our beliefs, fears, experience and learned dogma.

The human mind looks at every experience or thing as something to be labelled, it discriminates and comes to a conclusion perhaps in the range from good to bad … in this way by labelling an experience, good or bad, right or wrong, even profit or loss or pain or pleasure – we actually create duality in the world as we go along. However we need duality to survive and thrive in the material world, in the world of form and feelings.

From our individual beliefs and experiences we may each of us have a different understanding of words, people or events, as different beliefs on what things mean, come from our varied life experiences, beliefs and dogma – hence it is not unusual that many of us amy have a different perspective on any given experience.

To observe without evaluating is a higher state of consciousness, the highest form of intelligence.

There are those who unconsciously react without thought or reflection, who are driven by their desires, their egos, their past, as well as those with the illusion of knowledge and who in their beliefs are seemingly devoid of compassion, empathy or kindness. This idea of rugged individualism will ultimately fail, it is failing now, for in my view humanity thrives best in concert with others in a collaborative, co-operative dynamic, rather than the current state of blame, judgement, regurgitated dogma which results in conflict and confrontations.

For me, I am happy to understand that we are NOT just our minds – for the mind is not the best tool on it’s own to understand our motivations, our feelings which may result in our actions, the stimulus … “why” we do things, but as I have mentioned previously on this site, understanding this is possible for those that wish it to be.

My view that each time we judge others and then project our own beliefs (which originated from our experiences, dogma, our beliefs and thus expectations) as ego onto others we reveal an unhealed part of ourselves, a part of us that is not strong, authentic and whole.

Whilst it may be impossible not to form an impression of some kind for someone we just met, or form an opinion of the behaviours of others we already know – what we can do, is change what happens next, for to judge another is to assume a position to which we have no right …. we cannot know another for we have not lived their life, walked in their shoes, so to speak, the best we can do is to assume they are like us – in fact many of us hardly know ourselves, so to judge another, to feel superior over another is in my perspective a failing, a destructive aspect of society and humanity.

Tolerance … Wonderful diversity … for we are all the same, we all seek engagement with our community, our friends and those we love. Everyone, every life has an equal value in the Universe.

For me, Judgement and projection of our beliefs onto others is not an enlightened activity, it is, like competition and comparison essentially meaningless.

Once we have the awareness of this aspect of us and we desire to change this propensity to judge and project, it can and is ameliorated and alleviated over time, normally by the internal witnessing of your thoughts and actions. It is something we have to do for ourselves, for we cannot save or change others, for change is something we each have to do for ourselves.

As Buddha said …. “Drop by drop is the water pot filled. Likewise, the wise man, gathering it little by little, fills himself with good.”

My posts are simply my perspective and are offered in the spirit of discovery, exploration and empowerment – take what resonates with you and leave the rest.

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A Visit to Houston, Texas

I arrived in Houston from Tampa, Florida by United Airlines …. travelling on this occasion was quite an improvement on my last outing with the airline.

My sister was at Houston airport to meet me, such a delight, it was so good to see her after all this time, but strangely, it was as though for the first time – she is such a beautiful soul.

Houston was a surprise, my love for cities in general is rare … Houston is by and large a clean city from what I saw and surprisingly it dawns on you slowly about the paradox that is Houston, others have wondered what my perspective might be – frankly it was a surprise, for in one area you have the absolute frenetic activity of the business side, from the wide expanses of freeways, with layers upon layers of cloverleafs and crossovers, to the broad clean streets of the one way roads in the city center, to theatres, where we took the opportunity to see an Arthur Miller play ( A View from the bridge – here ) at the Alley theatre, then the transition to the unexpected simplicity and beauty of close residential areas of the green inner city suburbs, the quietness, the oak trees and the beauty of nature expressed in the parks, sculptures, community gardens and parks, such a nice feeling it generates.

Although I am writing this in September, I visited Houston in May / June 2017 … hence now we also have the perspective of the impact of Hurricane Harvey …. as well.

Flood control is a priority in the city, so how much does Houston spend on flood control – here is an article that gives a view on this – here as well here is an article concerning the effect on Houston of the recent Huricane itself – here

A picture of an inner suburb in Houston .. an area of parks, museums, art galleries and a University.

A Community Garden in the inner suburbs of Houston

We went to an Arthur Miller play ( A View from the bridge ) at the Alley Theatre in Houston. It had been a long time since I had seen a play with stage acting … nice!

To encapsulate, I really like Houston …. it had a calming feeling to it …. trees and greenery in those places I visited was refreshing and energising.

I Left Houston by Amtrak train to El Paso as I thought it would give me time to see some scenery and meet and talk with other people …. that experience comes in the next travel post where I am on my way to Santa Fe, New Mexico via Albuquerque.

Writing a Healing Journal

Writing meditation is an exercise that I have used, and today some 20+ years later I still carry a notebook.

The purpose of this is to help direct our mind to understand and then change our behavior, by understanding the causality of that behaviour. This created for me a place to start.

The way I have understood this is that any challenge we have undergone, in the past or even a current challenge is often not understood at a feeling level – because we are face to face with it, we cannot understand the entirety of the experience.

Hence by writing we can forge a connection between the conscious mind and that part of our mind that houses feelings. Now do correct me if I am wrong but feelings are placed in the mammalian part of the brain, referred to as the Limbic system … it’s where emotions and feelings are, it also where all decisions are made … so I have found by writing every day we gradually form a link between the feeling part of the mind and the rational mind … over time we create a perspective as we convert the feelings into something we can understand … a cause .. we have to do this as the Limbic system does not have language hence, we have to understand its messages another way …. gradual and regular journal writing did that for me, perhaps it can do it for you?

Gradually over time, we form a link between the parts of the brain and will understand that a frustration we might be feeling may be something like a past regret, a depression or some level of anxiousness about something in the future …the quickest way to start to understand this is to say …. if you are feeling guilt, depression or shameful then the event you are thinking about occurred in the past. If you are feeling fearful or anxious then the event you are concerned you expect it to occur in the future.

Many of the common feelings come from fear … control comes from fear, aggression comes from fear … even conformity is based on control which mostly comes from fear, there can also be fear that non-conformity will hinder us in attaining their goals or being accepted … Governments love it, but conformity is a pipe dream as it is quite unattainable – that is where Government use fear, blaming minorities, scarcity and alleged external threats to control us, to subdue us. The only real threat to most countries comes from within, from the egoes of those in power, the politicins themselves.

This whole experience is about how you and I relate to what makes up our personal world, what is our relationship to its various parts.

For this reason, once you discover what your concerns are, divide them into two groups, what you can do something about, like change your attitude to a past personal event or forgive those concerned (this brings freedom as well) and the second group … those things we can do nothing about … the actions of Government and bureaucracy … something that individually we can do little about … the reason we split the triggers, the categories for concern, is that we need to empower ourselves and trying to make sense of or understand a Government / Bureaucratic action is difficult, implausible … but detaching from it, we are no longer a victim, we can understand what is going on within.

To start, take a few minutes a day (most days if you can) … find a quiet place and start writing … I would go down to the local park, take my shoes and socks off, ground myself in the grass or the soil and begin.

I have found that after about a week of being quiet and writing, you will find yourself becoming more in tune with your feelings, you will become calmer … this can help with your day to day relationships —- My experience is that the changes in your understanding and behaviour will take place without any conscious effort, no matter how old, or what has happened in the past in the normal course of your life, writing a journal will literally calm and begin to bring a greater understanding to your life in just a matter of a few weeks.

A good thing about writing is that we can go back and look at it gain in the future, in my case this allowed me to look at what I had learnt aand how I had changed. When an event no longer confronted me, I would remove the pages and birn them …. for some reason those issues would only very rarely return.

Though this experience behind this post is many years old, and speaks to an experience even older, I thought it may have value to someone.

This is not the only way, do what works for you, as I have said before my articles are simply my perspective and they are offered in the spirit of discovery and empowerment – take what resonates with you and leave the rest.

A Process of facing fears and personal transformation

Though this post is many years old, and speaks to an experience even older, I thought perhaps some of it may have value to someone.

I had been aware for some time of my limiting thoughts, emotional blocks and unconscious behaviours – these are basically hangovers from our past, our previous learned responses which had outlived their usefulness to the person we might wish to be …. for me they were stopping me taking a leap … however the strange part is that I had the answer within me .. what I needed to do was repeat a process which I had carried out once before – for when you think about it, everything in life is a process, in this case to confront these behaviours which were now irrelevant to my life and renew myself … in a way to renounce who and what I was, and allow myself the freedom to introduce myself to what next evolution of me … the same process is available for everyone, from that awareness, we eventually come to the Acceptance that action is needed … then when we are ready we do take action.

Twenty five years ago, I went through a period of intense personal change – looking back now, the program was based quite loosley on the 12 step program .. a proven program, which has been going since 1935 … in my case I am not driven by the need to stop drinking, but by the need to use the Transformational 12 steps program to help bring around personal change … to change the way I react without thinking – so that basically I don’t .. in fact to change my default response to pause and reflection before I respond – giving me that time to consider the impact of my words and deeds on others, but also our own evolution … in other words to respond from strength, instead of reacting from weakness – for me the outcome helped made me whole – after the completion of the program, I am content from within me … however the work doesn’t stop there, for now on it is also a continual process of self assessment, the development of your internaal witness – on this occasion , I knew it was time, I was committed to change, in fact, I had been looking for a way to make it happen for months … and just before this time, I felt I was in darkness, always feeling my way forward, metaphorically falling over stuff .. this stuff was my past, my beliefs, my history, my limitations.

Note before starting … you need to be committed to this course of action without any reservation … if you are not committed, it won’t work .. you can’t fake it … it’s a process – I needed to follow the 12 steps, some are not easy because they can be a very confronting process – have the courage and belief in the process to follow where they lead, for if you want your future to be different from your today … it is journey to take .. you might use the analogy that the process, is almost a low level reformat of the way we look at life … it is equivalent to a process of clean up and clean out — for me it was worth it, let me assure you.

I went to a local AA meeting, just to feel the atmosphere .. to meet and talk to the people who had successfully come through the program .. a true strength, a compassion, but an overall humbleness from those (old timers) who had completed the program was all I felt … I went ahead with the steps in order, going through each until I was absolutely happy that I was totally committed to it – for me, as I was so committed to change and my previous experience with the program, it was not as difficult as I imagined, for I had been ready for such a process since before 2005.

You have to want to do it .. I might add it doesn’t magically rid your personality of these reactions to stimulus, again its a process, what it does is that it makes you very aware of your personal triggers that create reactions and behaviours, it allows you to confront them and once you have there is no fear, there is just contentment, happiness, love and a strength – a wish to help others – remember we all have fears and reactive demons at sometime during our path, our journey.

I believed I needed to become less reactive to stimulus .. to be mindful, present in the moment, to forgive and forget the past hurts and failures .. to bring into the present only the learning, my goal was to live life mindfully, part of which means we need to stay present .. for that is the only place where anything is created, the only time when things are real and can be done … this also means letting go of expectations (investing in them anyway), whatever they are, to be open to real abundance through love – to be open to the infinity of the Universe through love and abundance. I came to the realisation that when we invest in expectations we are by the very nature, creating illusions as these events are in the future, they haven’t happened yet, so if these expectations are unrealistic we are in fact setting ourselves up for disappointment.

If you feel the need, from the awareness of self, look at the process, if you need any help … please write … I will help how I can.

Since this, I have had some realizations that came from unblocking my limitations, incredible clarity has come …all this was like breaking through the shell if you like that had enclosed my understanding … now I guess I am within a bigger shell … one day I will push through those limitations as well.

It took me a while to write about this … personal transformation is something we can only do for ourselves and mostly by ourselves … the change comes from within … it brought for me strength, forgiveness, a commitment to love, to the self, and to my future self …. Good Luck!

This is not the only way, do what works for you, as I have said before my articles are simply my perspective and they are offered in the spirit of discovery and empowerment – take what resonates with you and leave the rest.

Losing my religion for Equality by Jimmy Carter

I truly respect this compassionate, noble man …. a true leader in our world society, he wrote the below I think in 2009 … speaking about equality not only for all people, but genders as well. Please read this.

 

JImmy Carter (Picture from Getty Images)

Losing My Religion for Equality
written by America’s 39th President Jimmy Carter.

“I HAVE been a practicing Christian all my life and a
deacon and Bible teacher for many years. My faith is a source of
strength and comfort to me, as religious beliefs are to hundreds of
millions of people around the world. So my decision to sever my ties
with the Southern Baptist Convention, after six decades, was painful and
difficult. It was, however, an unavoidable decision when the
convention’s leaders, quoting a few carefully selected Bible verses and
claiming that Eve was created second to Adam and was responsible for
original sin, ordained that women must be “subservient” to their
husbands and prohibited from serving as deacons, pastors or chaplains in
the military service.

This view that women are somehow inferior to men is not restricted to one religion or belief.
Women are prevented from playing a full and equal role in many faiths.
Nor, tragically, does its influence stop at the walls of the church,
mosque, synagogue or temple. This discrimination, unjustifiably
attributed to a Higher Authority, has provided a reason or excuse for
the deprivation of women’s equal rights across the world for centuries.

At its most repugnant, the belief that women must be
subjugated to the wishes of men excuses slavery, violence, forced
prostitution, genital mutilation and national laws that omit rape as a
crime.
But it also costs many millions of girls and women
control over their own bodies and lives, and continues to deny them fair
access to education, health, employment and influence within their own
communities.

The impact of these religious beliefs touches every aspect of our
lives. They help explain why in many countries boys are educated before
girls; why girls are told when and whom they must marry; and why many
face enormous and unacceptable risks in pregnancy and childbirth because
their basic health needs are not met.

In some Islamic nations, women are restricted in their movements,
punished for permitting the exposure of an arm or ankle, deprived of
education, prohibited from driving a car or competing with men for a
job. If a woman is raped, she is often most severely punished as the guilty party in the crime.

The same discriminatory thinking lies behind the continuing gender
gap in pay and why there are still so few women in office in the West.
The root of this prejudice lies deep in our histories, but its impact is
felt every day. It is not women and girls alone who suffer. It damages all of us.
The evidence shows that investing in women and girls delivers major
benefits for society. An educated woman has healthier children. She is
more likely to send them to school. She earns more and invests what she
earns in her family.

It is simply self-defeating for any community to discriminate against
half its population. We need to challenge these self-serving and
outdated attitudes and practices – as we are seeing in Iran where women
are at the forefront of the battle for democracy and freedom.
I understand, however, why many political leaders can be reluctant
about stepping into this minefield. Religion, and tradition, are
powerful and sensitive areas to challenge. But my fellow Elders and I,
who come from many faiths and backgrounds, no longer need to worry about
winning votes or avoiding controversy – and we are deeply committed to
challenging injustice wherever we see it.

The Elders are an independent group of eminent global leaders,
brought together by former South African president Nelson Mandela, who
offer their influence and experience to support peace building, help
address major causes of human suffering and promote the shared interests
of humanity. We have decided to draw particular attention to the
responsibility of religious and traditional leaders in ensuring equality
and human rights and have recently published a statement that declares:

The justification of discrimination against
women and girls on grounds of religion or tradition, as if it were
prescribed by a Higher Authority, is unacceptable.’

We are calling on all leaders to challenge and change the harmful
teachings and practices, no matter how ingrained, which justify
discrimination against women. We ask, in particular, that leaders of all
religions have the courage to acknowledge and emphasize the positive
messages of dignity and equality that all the world’s major faiths
share.

The carefully selected verses found in the Holy Scriptures to
justify the superiority of men, owe more to time and place – and the
determination of male leaders to hold onto their influence – than
eternal truths.
Similar biblical excerpts could be found to support the approval of slavery and the timid acquiescence to oppressive rulers.

I am also familiar with vivid descriptions in the same Scriptures in
which women are revered as pre-eminent leaders. During the years of the
early Christian church women served as deacons, priests, bishops,
apostles, teachers and prophets. It wasn’t until the fourth century that
dominant Christian leaders, all men, twisted and distorted Holy
Scriptures to perpetuate their ascendant positions within the religious
hierarchy.

The truth is that male religious leaders have had – and still
have – an option to interpret holy teachings either to exalt or
subjugate women. They have, for their own selfish ends, overwhelmingly
chosen the latter.
Their continuing choice provides the
foundation or justification for much of the pervasive persecution and
abuse of women throughout the world. This is in clear violation not just
of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights but also the teachings of
Jesus Christ, the Apostle Paul, Moses and the prophets, Muhammad, and
founders of other great religions – all of whom have called for proper
and equitable treatment of all the children of God. It is time we had the courage to challenge these views.

Thank you for reading this ….

The Fable of The Blind Men and the Elephant

With thanks to Inma VP for the inspiration and the image above (Image creator is unknown) …. Please read to end of poem …

THE BLIND MEN AND THE ELEPHANT.
A HINDU FABLE.

A poem by John Godfrey Saxe (1872) illustrates th story, and the issue.

i.

IT was six men of Indostan
To learning much inclined,
Who went to see the Elephant
(Though all of them were blind),
That each by observation
Might satisfy his mind.

ii.

The First approached the Elephant,
And happening to fall
Against his broad and sturdy side,
At once began to bawl:
“God bless me!—but the Elephant
Is very like a wall!”

iii.

The Second, feeling of the tusk,
Cried: “Ho!—what have we here
So very round and smooth and sharp?
To me ‘t is mighty clear
This wonder of an Elephant
Is very like a spear!”

iv.

The Third approached the animal,
And happening to take
The squirming trunk within his hands,
Thus boldly up and spake:
“I see,” quoth he, “the Elephant
Is very like a snake!”

v.

The Fourth reached out his eager hand,
And felt about the knee.
“What most this wondrous beast is like
Is mighty plain,” quoth he;
” ‘T is clear enough the Elephant
Is very like a tree!”

vi.

The Fifth, who chanced to touch the ear,
Said: “E’en the blindest man
Can tell what this resembles most;
Deny the fact who can,
This marvel of an Elephant
Is very like a fan!”

vii.

The Sixth no sooner had begun
About the beast to grope,
Than, seizing on the swinging tail
That fell within his scope,
“I see,” quoth he, “the Elephant
Is very like a rope!”

viii.

And so these men of Indostan
Disputed loud and long,
Each in his own opinion
Exceeding stiff and strong,
Though each was partly in the right,
And all were in the wrong!

Moral

So, oft in theologic wars
The disputants, I ween,
Rail on in utter ignorance
Of what each other mean,
And prate about an Elephant
Not one of them has seen!

But surely the picture of the blind men and the elephant also points to something bigger — The elephant itself?

 

Blind Men and the Elephant – Image Creator is Unknown

Indeed, each of the blind man has a limited perspective on the objective truth, but that doesn’t mean a truth isn’t there, for truth isn’t relative at all – the elephant is there to discover in its totality.

In the areas of the Spiritual or Religious and theology, we have only our personal perspective, in other disciplines we may have hints, even so this doesn’t mean any and all versions of Truth are equally valid. Actually, if we know (or believe) that the Whole Elephant is there, perhaps we should seek every opportunity to experience more of the elephant, a metaphor for example for the Divine?

In mankind’s attempt to understand his environment, we codify what we see in a way which we can understand within the knowledge and perspectives we have available at the time. As we evolve I would suggest that our perspective will …. we may see more of the elephant, perhaps one day we may see all of the elephant.

Here, I would give the floor to a beautiful mind with regard to an aspect of this …

“Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth” – Marcus Aurelius

Further From Wikipedia …

Modern treatments

The story is seen as a metaphor in many disciplines, being pressed into service as an analogy in fields well beyond the traditional. In physics, it has been seen as an analogy for the wave–particle duality.[19] In biology, the way the blind men hold onto different parts of the elephant has been seen as a good analogy for the Polyclonal B cell response.[20]

“Blind men and elephant”, from Martha Adelaide Holton & Charles Madison Curry, Holton-Curry readers, 1914.

The fable is one of a number of tales that cast light on the response of hearers or readers to the story itself. Idries Shah has commented on this element of self-reference in the many interpretations of the story, and its function as a teaching story:

…people address themselves to this story in one or more […] interpretations. They then accept or reject them. Now they can feel happy; they have arrived at an opinion about the matter. According to their conditioning they produce the answer. Now look at their answers. Some will say that this is a fascinating and touching allegory of the presence of God. Others will say that it is showing people how stupid mankind can be. Some say it is anti-scholastic. Others that it is just a tale copied by Rumi from Sanai – and so on. Shah adapted the tale in his book The Dermis Probe. This version begins with a conference of scientists, from different fields of expertise, presenting their conflicting conclusions on the material upon which a camera is focused. As the camera slowly zooms out it gradually becomes clear that the material under examination is the hide of an African elephant. The words ‘The Parts Are Greater Than The Whole’ then appear on the screen. This retelling formed the script for a short four-minute film by the animator Richard Williams. The film was chosen as an Outstanding Film of the Year and was exhibited at the London and New York film festivals.

The story enjoys a continuing appeal, as shown by the number of illustrated children’s books of the fable; there is one for instance by Paul Galdone and another, Seven Blind Mice, by Ed Young (1992).

 

“We have to remember that what we observe is not nature in itself, but nature exposed to our method of questioning.” — Werner Heisenberg

Our Relationships with Others

Morality is how we relate to the people we know, our family, our friends, our neighbours … ethics on the other hand is the true foundation of how we create a society … when someone projects their subjective personal beliefs on to a society, it is about their ego, to make them selves feel superior, essentially it is self-aggrandisement … in doing so little by little we destroy society itself .. for the whole act of judgement or blame is about separation … about separating one person from another – for we must remember that condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses.

True love does not judge, nor does it have any expectations, it does not to say to someone, become this person and I will love you … or the opposite for instance, if you change from this person; I won’t love you – for that sort of “love” is more of a Cathexis, an expression of the surface of life, perhaps even conditional love.

How do we find a conscious love without distortions in it? Through knowledge and acceptance of self, and also with solitude and meditation. Without these, love gets mutated and distorted by the surface of life. If there is knowledge, acceptance and meditation, love evolves into devotion; it remains pure and then evolves into bliss, joy.

Disrespecting someone, judgement and ascribing fault, is used by the ego to separate us, like control, judgement, anger, competing, comparison, conformity are all other non-present emotional projections, they are ‘ego’ driven thoughts – and essentially meaningless, like all fears when faced they show their illusion and in doing so we find ourselves and our strengths.

Everyone has their gifts, everyone, and each one is an equally valid gift from the Universe.

Everything that happens is essentially without expression, it is only in our beliefs where we ascribe a meaning, perhaps even a duality to it, a right or wrong, good or bad etc., hence our minds via our beliefs created duality as we go along. When beliefs become primary, it can manifest through its own brand of particularism such as in a cult – there are cults everywhere from the private to even Public companies say Apple Inc and Tesla … all within are true believers of their ideology, their dogma, their lives are defined through the duality of their beliefs, for instance Capitalism is a quintessential expression of duality (I.e profit / loss is good/bad) – within families, all experiences seems are seen as either good or bad, right or wrong, family or not – under pressure, this evolves into a fear based “them and us mentality” a dismissal and disrespect for all that appears on the surface to be different, it is a given that all ideologies eventually destroy themselves, when the actual survival of the ideology and the outcome envisaged (the prophesy itself) becomes more important than the people it is suppossed to serve.

There are really good and wonderful people in the world, the thing that separates us is awareness that they exist and our beliefs – it is very important to know that no one has the right to define themselves as right and others wrong … as for the majority of humanity, it is much easier to judge than to think – To judge is to label and therefore negate others and so dismiss (often without revisiting that first judgement) – true humanity and strengths is to feel with empathy, compassion, understanding and equanimity.

I cannot ascribe fault anymore for it leads to separation, in the higher self there are no certainties, things can only be viewed through probabilities even possibilities … for instance it is highly probable that the sun will rise tomorrow – the reality is that nothing is certain, change is continuous and everything ends, well not so much ends but changes, for we are again in transition to what comes next?

Happiness comes only in true Freedom, it comes from within, not from people things or circumstances – follow your personal bliss, challenges that will come are how we grow and we use them to break through the shells that encompass our understanding.

We see everything through the present moment, the past, is our personal perspective of our experiences (filtered through our beliefs and values) … The future is our expectations, our wishes … but this present moment is our only personal reality … these are the Buddha’s words, along with many spiritual leaders (including Dalai Lama, Lao Tzu, Bodhidharma, Eckhart Tolle, Marcus Aurelius and others)

Challenges come from circumstances and from others ..

“When another person makes you suffer, it is because he suffers deeply within himself, and his suffering is spilling over. He does not need punishment; he needs help” – Thích Nhất Hanh

When we unite with the light, a spiritual union occurs – then it is the individual’s choice to integrate with the Higher self or not – for me it was easy, a no brainer so to speak, once you decide to integrate, The Grace of “God, the Universe, Brahmin, the Source – the higher self (call her what you will) starts to descend to us (normally over time, but it can I believe be instantaneous) we detach from the physical world, much of what you once valued in duality seems empty and illusory because it is, your love becomes abundant, unconditional and conscious, you can feel life, every form of life within you from the greatest to the least – there is now only one choice, which is to love, to understand, to have compassion for all life, whatever its form.

Here is a book, the Zen Teachings of Bodhidharma that helped me understand my personal journey to the light – perhaps it might help others on their journey!

A difficult revelation of conditional “love” is the judgement, perhaps disrespect , contempt or worse that it brings.

Perhaps no one at your home was able in a simple act of compassion or empathy to think beyond themselves and their attachments and ask how you were … for me, I guess that is the true expression of the experience – their ego driven actions, their true selfishness..

It’s a given, that no one has the right in being purposefully cruel for any reason.

If you have many obstacles in your path … consider, perhaps the Universe is trying to tell you something – perhaps that the path you are on, is not your path … be sure it is … for being on the wrong path and through your actions, you can generate Karma …

“As a man himself sows, so he himself reaps; no man inherits the good or evil act of another man. The fruit is of the same quality as the action” – Mahabharata, xii.291.22

We are all accountable for our choices, as I have learnt personally – do not blame those you who hurt you, for they are only instruments of Karma – Karma holds us all accountable for our behaviour in particular our actions towards others – how Karma will choose to balance the scales for the actions of others towards you and other life forms, is not for myself or others to speculate how. Alternatively, you may have chosen to be an instrument of someone else’s Karma.

I can feel only love and compassion for you all, if any truly wish non-judgmental spiritual help, then come find me … and we will work towards the light together, if you’re not up for that, no problem, find another, for when it is your turn you will journey to the light in this life or another, it is a journey we will all make. By staying attached to the illusions of this world, once can never be truly happy, because in being attached we are never truly free – and true happiness comes in freedom.

After a four-year journey on this experience, I have moved onto other things strengthened and enriched, you are each on your own, except of course for the infinite love and power of the Universe that is within each of you, but I am going to project my beliefs and say – your perception was that I was the problem however I believe I was a solution – fear itself is the problem.

I am thinking of you all as I write these words … face your fears … they are paper tigers … empty illusions. Judgment and blame separates us … the desire to control others comes from ego and fear and not taking your own responsibility for your part in an experience – controlling others controls you – instead stay present, be mindful and accept and flow … there is no way around pain or fear, the only way out is through.

Open your heart to those in need, do not make assumptions. You are not a judge, you are a coach, and in the future you may just be the guide that makes all the difference to someone else’s life.

There are two main motivators in life, love and fear. Choose wisely!