The Ego and spiritual progress!

Something I am unable to do is:

(1) compare myself to others, for we are all unique and on separate paths to different destinies.

(2) Try to quantify my spiritual progress.. you know to say I am this, for example, mindful, conscious etc. Such statements are generated by the ego, to use as an identity crutch. Your meaning comes in how your perspective changes over time, how you relate to yourself and others and in what you feel, see and understand.

As well, it is important to understand that such thoughts are meaningless … to compare or compete with another is ego driven! In doing so, you are trying to separate yourself, make some distinction between you and others when there is none, there is only your path and your destiny. The bottom line is that you are you, a wonderful unique individual with unlimited potential to follow your bliss. Any limitations we have, come from ourselves, in how we view ourselves, based on our beliefs and experiences.

 

Perhaps the image is simplistic … however it shows the marked difference between ego and the soul, between separation and true love.

Let me illustrate the Ego aberration anecdotally – after a class, I was waiting for a train, two students were talking about which one was more advanced spiritually … they tried to include me in their conversation, eventually I had to suggest the following observation to both of them, that this need to compare with another, shows that as yet, neither of them were on a genuine spiritual path … For if you were, you would know the ridiculousness of comparison, we cannot compare … as the spiritual path is essentially solitary, personal and spiritual, where the ego has no place, because it wants an identity separate from others.

In any case, what is the point of comparison? There is none, except to somehow make you feel better, separate from or feel superior in some way to another.

Just get on with your life; for it is quite easy to understand if you are present, even mindful, because it will be revealed in how you approach each day and how you respond to the challenges within these days.

As we are all different, it does not matter where you are on your path, the object is to be open, to be, and stay curious, to face and go beyond our limitations, to keep growing through learning from new experiences – the ego has no part, in this process.

My posts are simply my perspective and are offered in the spirit of discovery, exploration and evolution – take what resonates with you and leave the rest.

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Life before Meditation

There is much wisdom in the world, and humanity has gone through instances in the past of great spiritual growth, in the times gone by of the great prophets, the enlightened awakened and the sages and philosophers of humanity, both male and female.

The times in the past of profound spiritual growth, through the wisdom and teachings of Lao Tzu, Confucius, Buddha, Mohammed, Jesus Christ and more recently Gandhi, just to name a few, there are many other great and wonderful souls both male and female in our past, that can light our path, if we let them.

For my personal experience the below is a telling quote, which was the beginning of my being present and then creation of mindfulness for me – the quotation is from Lao Tzu, a philosopher and poet, who lived in China around 2,500 years ago, the founder of Taoism and the (probable) author of the Tao Te Ching, a truly wonderful book, which I keep near me. I find new meaning in, almost every time I pick it up.

“If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious, the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present” – Lao Tzu

This is a very revealing quotation for it gives you the baseline so to speak, the beginning point for living in the present … if we monitor our thoughts we can tell for instance is we are living in the past, we are depressed, of perhaps thinking of a time of a lost love, lost fortune, missed opportunity, regret, guilt or shame … if on the other hand we are anxious … we are concerned about something that has yet to happen … and expectation or a fear that is yet to be fulfilled, such as a specific event or perhaps a general feeling of unease or doubt about one’s future prospect … being present on the other hand, is when we are creating something, writing, composing, playing intense sport, or perhaps even making love, being entertained, or something that requires all our attention to be totally in the present moment .. a place where there is no thought of the past or the future only the moment you are in.

There are many other aspects of thought, such as ego that can only thrive when we are not present, it is fed by the way we look at the world and of course our beliefs and fears, … almost every one of these are groundless, but the ego needs them to give you an identity, to separate you from another, so you can pointlessly compare yourself to another … silly really, for comparison like competition is meaningless, more on the ego, another time.

One is in fact always in the present moment, don’t fight me on this, just wait and see how this unfolds, for we view the past as a memory (a memory from our own perspective, our own point of view) from the present moment … we look to the future as an expectation, again only from the present moment … realising this, is the beginning of the path to being present.

If you are constantly referring to the past, the best way (for me) was to accept it, and so come to terms with it, perhaps even to give yourself an apology, one you may never have received from those in your past, to forgive another, to learn, always to learn from the past, in fact from all experiences.

Now we do not forgive past transgressions for the sake of another, we are forgiving the past so we can be free of it, so it won’t control our actions in the present, to move on and more easily reside in the present moment … always the present moment… to at some time in the future, we bring that present moment out of the practise of meditation and live our life that way, almost always in the present moment is the aim of mindful – meditation at this point, for we must remember, that we do not meditate to find peace, we meditate to be at peace with what we find.

The only point we have here to remember that whilst being present, even mindful, once grasped is relatively easy, but remembering to be mindful, not always is … but as soon as we feel ourselves drifting away from the present moment, don’t engage, return to the present, for there is peace and reality, the “what is” of your life.

A Conscious Journey

Many years ago, I went out to exercise, and meditated in the park as I often did, a new experience visited …. it was as if a pebble had been dropped in a pond, the ripples went outwards and outwards from my consciousness touching all life …. bringing it within me. Each life was different in the hues of colour, for life is abundant.

From that moment on, we are connected to every life form, from the tiniest to the largest mammals and the multitude of life in the cosmos.

We can at almost any time bring that experience to focus, for that light is within.

I believe a child is born enlightened, as when they are young, there are no barriers between ourselves and the outside world, they are part of everything they see and experience! I once saw a toddler experience rain for the first time …. there was so much joy to see in her.

I would suggest that the ego is not formed at this age, so children have no idea that they are separate from anyone or anything. I don’t know whether the ego is born with us, or due to our upbringing we are infected by it. For the source of all atrocities in humanity is an ideology, a dogma or a belief that is pursued by the ego and facilitated by the mind.

We are all born abundant, only our thoughts change this ….

When children reach about 6-8 years old they can be reasoned with, this for me is when meditation might be offered, for when meditation is learnt, at some point it may evolve to mindfulness and in that state the worries and self criticism that we normally experience are given their real perspective of their impact on our lives, for when mindful we stay present and flow. We then see that most of our fears and non-present thoughts are illusions.

If it their destiny, then again over time, mindless-mindfulness will come. But what do I mean and understand by this? It is a state of consciousness, where one does not cling to anything, but is clear in all cases, without hindrance or obstruction, without being stained, yet without dwelling in statelessness.

The Evolution of the Consciousness … this is the best way (for me) to illustrate what happens as a we evolve.

Imagine you are in a Movie theatre …. When we are young (it is not everyones destiny to evolve in this life). We sit in the front row, surrounded by and (for me) assaulted by the very loudness of the speakers. The light from the screen draws us inwards, it becomes a part of us, we lose ourselves in it. We focuses absolutely on experiencing the entertainment (or distraction) …. Perhaps another example of this particular experience would be, when we focus only on achievement, or in the case of Entertainment, smartphones, some extreme sports, Play-stations and other game boxes, do by their very nature force us to stay present – in doing so they bring us a dopamine burst – our self-gratification..

During the movie, we do not think about ourselves at all, unless we do not enjoy the movie, then our other thoughts may be of a not-present nature.

As we evolve, we move little by little towards the rear of the Theatre, and as the distance lengthens between where we are and the screen (life), it becomes progressively distant, we observe an ever widening perspective of the image, of life and our place within it, we see it not as a single event, but the big-picture, including the events that led to it …. We realise that in many ways we can be our own enemy for when we focus on a fear or an expectation and over think it, it often leads to suffering …. Remember what we focus, we give energy to and so this thought (good or bad) grows in our lives.

Meditation that we do in the morning, is practice, at some point in this practice, we are able to carry that state with us throughout the day and in our life.

If we are able (which is happening in some schools) to teach mindful meditation to children as young as 8, will over time, over the generations, I feel will change the nature of humanity, and will lead to a self respect and therefore respecting others, for me it is on the path to peace, love and understanding.

When in mindfulness we stay present in the moment, not reliving the past or investing in our expectations of the future – this does not mean we don’t responsibly plan for the future, it just means we stay present and don’t invest in and therefore do not live in the future by building and living in castles we build in the air, instead of creating our futures in the present moment.

Eventually, if it is on the path of the individual, we evolve further and come via little steps to a Mindless-Mindful state where unless we have a task to do that needs our mind, the mind of the person is at rest, and empty of thoughts. This place is a also an incredible place of calm. Hence when an event happens that requires our mind we can give it our absolute focus and attention.

We can only create our life, make decisions and plan in the present moment because that is the only moment we have … it’s the only place we can act when you think about it, as well we look at the past through the present moment and we look to the future through the present as well.

Anyone can reach enlightenment in life, (some may spontaneously change due to a sound or other stimulus) or by study or when they face and overcome the major challenges that come in their lives. There are multiple, perhaps uncountable paths to spiritual growth, but what is common to all paths, is the state we are in when we arrive.

In my case, I was asked by my soul, did I want to go through the portal (the image I had of the next step), I said “if I don’t what will happen”, my soul responded “You will go no further, we will stop here” …. For me I said lets go forward, I have not regretted that decision.

Words are generally poor conveyors of meaning, especially of such experiences and of absolutes …. As you are aware, words convey only part of the message, the rough plot (a bare bones storyboard) so to speak. I hope that this gives you some background of the journey that awaits us all (my belief) in this life or another …. all of us, will evolve to the light.

My articles are simply my perspective and they are offered in the spirit of discovery and empowerment – take what resonates with you and leave the rest.

The Fable of The Blind Men and the Elephant

With thanks to Inma VP for the inspiration and the image above (Image creator is unknown) …. Please read to end of poem …

THE BLIND MEN AND THE ELEPHANT.
A HINDU FABLE.

A poem by John Godfrey Saxe (1872) illustrates th story, and the issue.

i.

IT was six men of Indostan
To learning much inclined,
Who went to see the Elephant
(Though all of them were blind),
That each by observation
Might satisfy his mind.

ii.

The First approached the Elephant,
And happening to fall
Against his broad and sturdy side,
At once began to bawl:
“God bless me!—but the Elephant
Is very like a wall!”

iii.

The Second, feeling of the tusk,
Cried: “Ho!—what have we here
So very round and smooth and sharp?
To me ‘t is mighty clear
This wonder of an Elephant
Is very like a spear!”

iv.

The Third approached the animal,
And happening to take
The squirming trunk within his hands,
Thus boldly up and spake:
“I see,” quoth he, “the Elephant
Is very like a snake!”

v.

The Fourth reached out his eager hand,
And felt about the knee.
“What most this wondrous beast is like
Is mighty plain,” quoth he;
” ‘T is clear enough the Elephant
Is very like a tree!”

vi.

The Fifth, who chanced to touch the ear,
Said: “E’en the blindest man
Can tell what this resembles most;
Deny the fact who can,
This marvel of an Elephant
Is very like a fan!”

vii.

The Sixth no sooner had begun
About the beast to grope,
Than, seizing on the swinging tail
That fell within his scope,
“I see,” quoth he, “the Elephant
Is very like a rope!”

viii.

And so these men of Indostan
Disputed loud and long,
Each in his own opinion
Exceeding stiff and strong,
Though each was partly in the right,
And all were in the wrong!

Moral
So, oft in theologic wars
The disputants, I ween,
Rail on in utter ignorance
Of what each other mean,
And prate about an Elephant
Not one of them has seen!

But surely the picture of the blind men and the elephant also points to something bigger — The elephant itself?

 

Blind Men and the Elephant – Image Creator is Unknown

Indeed, each of the blind man has a limited perspective on the objective truth, but that doesn’t mean a truth isn’t there, for truth isn’t relative at all – the elephant is there to discover in its totality.

In the areas of the Spiritual or Religious and theology, we have only our personal perspective, in other disciplines we may have hints, even so this doesn’t mean any and all versions of Truth are equally valid. Actually, if we know (or believe) that the Whole Elephant is there, perhaps we should seek every opportunity to experience more of the elephant, a metaphor for example for the Divine?

In mankind’s attempt to understand his environment, we codify what we see in a way which we can understand within the knowledge and perspectives we have available at the time. As we evolve I would suggest that our perspective will …. we may see more of the elephant, perhaps one day we may see all of the elephant.

Here, I would give the floor to a beautiful mind with regard to an aspect of this …

“Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth” – Marcus Aurelius

Further From Wikipedia …

Modern treatments

The story is seen as a metaphor in many disciplines, being pressed into service as an analogy in fields well beyond the traditional. In physics, it has been seen as an analogy for the wave–particle duality. In biology, the way the blind men hold onto different parts of the elephant has been seen as a good analogy.

“Blind men and elephant”, from Martha Adelaide Holton & Charles Madison Curry, Holton-Curry readers, 1914.

The fable is one of a number of tales that cast light on the response of hearers or readers to the story itself. Idries Shah has commented on this element of self-reference in the many interpretations of the story, and its function as a teaching story:

… people address themselves to this story in one or more interpretations. They then accept or reject them. Now they can feel happy; they have arrived at an opinion about the matter. According to their conditioning they produce the answer. Now look at their answers. Some will say that this is a fascinating and touching allegory of the presence of God. Others will say that it is showing people how stupid mankind can be. Some say it is anti-scholastic. Others that it is just a tale copied by Rumi from Sanai – and so on. Shah adapted the tale in his book The Dermis Probe. This version begins with a conference of scientists, from different fields of expertise, presenting their conflicting conclusions on the material upon which a camera is focused. As the camera slowly zooms out it gradually becomes clear that the material under examination is the hide of an African elephant. The words ‘The Parts Are Greater Than The Whole’ then appear on the screen. This retelling formed the script for a short four-minute film by the animator Richard Williams. The film was chosen as an Outstanding Film of the Year and was exhibited at the London and New York film festivals.

The story enjoys a continuing appeal, as shown by the number of illustrated children’s books of the fable; there is one for instance by Paul Galdone and another, Seven Blind Mice, by Ed Young (1992).

 

“We have to remember that what we observe is not nature in itself, but nature exposed to our method of questioning.” — Werner Heisenberg

The Ability to Observe without Evaluating

In my view and perhaps the view of others, for just and compassionate communications, we will all evolve, each in their own time to separate the Observation from the evaluation. I say this for when we combine observation with evaluation (our ego), others may hear criticism and may take offence (their ego) to what we are saying, or they will hear our projected observation that may be quite uninformed and therefore unjust. For each time we engage with the world, we interpret it through our ego, beliefs, fears, experience and learned dogma.

The human mind generally looks at every experience or thing as something to be labelled, it discriminates and comes to a conclusion perhaps in the range from good to bad … in this way by labelling an experience, good or bad, right or wrong, even profit or loss or pain or pleasure – we can then move on because we have am outcome, we have a judgement on the experience or the event, hence in doing this we actually create duality in the world as we go along. However despite all I say below, there are times when we do need to evaluate circumstances and experiences to navigate safely the physical duality world, the world of form and feelings.

From our individual beliefs and experiences we may each of us have a different understanding of words, people or events, as different beliefs on what things mean, come from our varied life experiences, beliefs and dogma – hence it is not unusual that many of us amy have a different perspective on any given experience.

To observe without evaluating is a higher state of consciousness, the highest form of intelligence.

There are those who unconsciously react without thought or reflection, who are driven by their desires, their egos, some dogma, their past, as well as those with the illusion of knowledge and who in their beliefs are seemingly devoid of compassion, empathy or kindness.

However this idea of rugged individualism will ultimately fail, it is failing now, for in my view humanity thrives best in concert with others in a collaborative, co-operative dynamic, rather than the current state of blame, judgement, regurgitated dogma which results in conflict and confrontation.

For me, I am happy to understand that we are NOT just our minds – however the mind is not the best tool on it’s own to understand our motivations, our feelings, which may initiate actions. The stimulus … “why” we do things, but as I have mentioned previously on this site, understanding this is possible for those that wish it to.

My view that each time we judge others and then project our own beliefs (which originated from our experiences, dogma, our beliefs and thus expectations) as ego onto others we reveal an unhealed part of ourselves, a part of us that is not strong, authentic and whole.

Whilst it may be impossible not to form an impression of some kind for someone we just met, or form an opinion of the behaviours of others we already know – what we can do, is change what happens next, for to judge another is to assume a position to which we have no right …. we cannot know another for we have not lived their life, walked in their shoes, so to speak, the best we can do is to assume they are like us – which is an illusion, as in fact many of us hardly know ourselves, so to judge another, to feel superior over another is in my perspective a failing, a destructive aspect of society and humanity.

Tolerance … Wonderful diversity … for we are all the same, we all seek engagement with our community, our friends and those we love. Everyone, every life has an equal value in the Universe.

For me, Judgement and projection of our beliefs onto others is not an enlightened activity, it is, like competition and comparison essentially meaningless.

Once we have the awareness of this aspect of us and we desire to change this propensity to judge and project, it can and is ameliorated and alleviated over time, normally by the internal witnessing of your thoughts and actions. It is something we have to do for ourselves, for we cannot save or change others, for change is something we each have to do for ourselves.

We must remember that we are the witness to the story, not the player in the story.

As Buddha said …. “Drop by drop is the water pot filled. Likewise, the wise man, gathering it little by little, fills himself with good.”

My posts are simply my perspective and are offered in the spirit of discovery, exploration and empowerment – take what resonates with you and leave the rest.

A Process of facing fears and personal transformation

Though this post is many years old, and speaks to an experience even older, I thought perhaps some of it may have value to someone.

I had been aware for some time of my limiting thoughts, emotional blocks and unconscious behaviours – these are basically hangovers from our past, our previous learned responses which had outlived their usefulness to the person we might wish to be …. for me they were stopping me taking a leap … however the strange part is that I had the answer within me .. what I needed to do was repeat a process which I had carried out once before – for when you think about it, everything in life is a process, in this case to confront these behaviours which were now irrelevant to my life and renew myself … in a way to renounce who and what I was, and allow myself the freedom to introduce myself to what next evolution of me … the same process is available for everyone, from that awareness, we eventually come to the Acceptance that action is needed … then when we are ready we do take action.

 

Thank you to the unknown photographers.

Twenty five years ago, I went through a period of intense personal change – looking back now, the process was based quite loosely on the 12 step program .. a proven program, which has been going since 1935 … in my case I am not driven by the need to stop drinking, but by the need to use the Transformational 12 steps program to help bring around personal change … to change the way I react without thinking – so that basically I don’t .. in fact to change my default response to pause and reflection before I respond – giving me that time to consider the impact of my words and deeds on others, but also our own evolution … in other words to respond from strength, instead of reacting from weakness – for me the outcome helped made me whole – after the completion of the program, I am content from within me … however the work doesn’t stop there, for now on it is also a continual process of self assessment, the development of your internal witness – on this occasion , I knew it was time, I was committed to change, in fact, I had been looking for a way to make it happen for months … and just before this time, I felt I was in darkness, always feeling my way forward, metaphorically falling over stuff .. this stuff was my past, my beliefs, my history, my limitations.

Note before starting … you need to be committed to this course of action without any reservation … if you are not committed, it won’t work .. you can’t fake it … it’s a process – I needed to follow the 12 steps, some are not easy because they can be a very confronting process – have the courage and belief in the process to follow where they lead, for if you want your future to be different from your today … it is journey to take .. you might use the analogy that the process, is almost a low level reformat of the way we look at life … it is equivalent to a process of clean up and clean out — for me it was worth it, let me assure you.

I went to a local AA meeting, just to feel the atmosphere .. to meet and talk to the people who had successfully come through the program .. a true strength, a compassion, but an overall humbleness from those (old timers) who had completed the program was all I felt … I went ahead with the steps in order, going through each until I was absolutely happy that I was totally committed to it – for me, as I was so committed to change and my previous experience with the program, it was not as difficult as I imagined, for I had been ready for such a process since before 2000.

You have to want to do it .. I might add it doesn’t magically rid your personality of these reactions to stimulus, again its a process, what it does is that it makes you very aware of your personal triggers that create reactions and behaviours, it allows you to confront them and once you have, there is no fear, there is just a growing contentment, happiness, love and a strength – a wish to help others – remember we all have fears and reactive demons at sometime on our path, our journey.

I believed I needed to become less reactive to stimulus .. to be mindful, present in the moment, to forgive and forget the past hurts and failures .. to bring into the present only the learning, my goal was to live life mindfully, part of which means we need to stay present .. for that is the only place where anything is created, the only time when things are real and can be done … this also means letting go of expectations (investing in them anyway), whatever they are, to be open to the Universe through love and abundance. I came to the realisation that when we invest in expectations we are by the very nature, creating illusions as these events are in the future, they haven’t happened yet, as Buddha said attachments bring suffering, so if the expectations are unrealistic we are in fact setting ourselves up for disappointment and perhaps pain.

If you feel the need, from the awareness of self, look at the process, if you need any help … please write … I will help how I can.

Since this, I have had some realizations that came from unblocking my limitations, incredible clarity has come … all this was like breaking through the shell if you like that had enclosed my understanding … now I guess I am within a bigger shell … one day I will push through those limitations as well.

It took me a while to write about this … personal transformation is something we can only do for ourselves and mostly by ourselves … the change comes from within in fact everything does … it brought me strength, forgiveness, a commitment to love, to the self, and to my future self …. Good Luck!

This is not the only way, do what works for you, as I have said before my articles are simply my perspective and they are offered in the spirit of discovery and empowerment – take what resonates with you and leave the rest.

Our Relationships with Others

Morality is how we relate to the people we know, our family, our friends, our neighbours … ethics on the other hand is the true foundation of how we create a society … when someone projects their subjective personal beliefs on to a society, it is about their ego, to make themselves feel superior, better than the other, essentially it is about self-aggrandisement … in doing so little by little we destroy society itself .. for the whole act of judgement or blame is about separation … about separating one person from another – for we must remember that condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses.

 

True love does not judge, nor does it have any expectations, it does not to say to someone, become this person and I will love you … or the opposite for instance, if you change from this person; I won’t love you – for that sort of “love” is more of a Cathexis, an expression of the surface of life, perhaps even conditional love.

How do we find a conscious love without distortions in it? Through knowledge and acceptance of self, and also with solitude and meditation. Without these, love gets mutated and distorted by the surface of life. If there is knowledge, acceptance and meditation, love evolves into devotion; it remains pure and then evolves into bliss, joy.

Disrespecting someone, judgement and ascribing fault, is used by the ego to separate us, like control, judgement, anger, competing, comparison, conformity are all other non-present emotional projections, they are ‘ego’ driven thoughts – and essentially meaningless, like all fears when faced they show their illusion and in doing so we find ourselves and our strengths.

Everyone has their gifts, everyone, and each one is an equally valid gift from the Universe.

Everything that happens is essentially without expression, it is only in our beliefs where we ascribe a meaning, perhaps even a duality to it, a right or wrong, good or bad etc., hence our minds via our beliefs created duality as we go along. When beliefs become primary, it can manifest through its own brand of particularism such as in a cult – there are cults everywhere from the private to even Public companies say Apple Inc and Tesla … all within are true believers of their ideology, their dogma, their lives are defined through the duality of their beliefs, for instance Capitalism is a quintessential expression of duality (I.e profit / loss is good/bad) – within families, all experiences seems are seen as either good or bad, right or wrong, family or not – under pressure, this evolves into a fear based “them and us mentality” a dismissal and disrespect for all that appears on the surface to be different, it is a given that all ideologies eventually destroy themselves, when the actual survival of the ideology and the outcome envisaged (the prophesy itself) becomes more important than the people it is suppossed to serve.

There are really good and wonderful people in the world, the thing that separates us is awareness that they exist and our beliefs – it is very important to know that no one has the right to define themselves as right and others wrong … as for the majority of humanity, it is much easier to judge than to think – To judge is to label and therefore negate others and so dismiss (often without revisiting that first judgement) – true humanity and strengths is to feel with empathy, compassion, understanding and equanimity.

I cannot ascribe fault anymore for it leads to separation, in the higher self there are no certainties, things can only be viewed through probabilities even possibilities … for instance it is highly probable that the sun will rise tomorrow – the reality is that nothing is certain, change is continuous and everything ends, well not so much ends but changes, for we are again in transition to what comes next?

Happiness comes only in true Freedom, it comes from within, not from people things or circumstances – follow your personal bliss, challenges that will come are how we grow and we use them to break through the shells that encompass our understanding.

We see everything through the present moment, the past, is our personal perspective of our experiences (filtered through our beliefs and values) … The future is our expectations, our wishes … but this present moment is our only personal reality … these are the Buddha’s words, along with many spiritual leaders (including Dalai Lama, Lao Tzu, Bodhidharma, Eckhart Tolle, Marcus Aurelius and others)

Challenges come from circumstances and from others ..

“When another person makes you suffer, it is because he suffers deeply within himself, and his suffering is spilling over. He does not need punishment; he needs help” – Thích Nhất Hanh

When we unite with the light, a spiritual union occurs – then it is the individual’s choice to integrate with the Higher self or not – for me it was easy, a no brainer so to speak, once you decide to integrate, The Grace of “God, the Universe, Brahmin, the Source – the higher self (call her what you will) starts to descend to us (normally over time, but it can I believe be instantaneous) we detach from the physical world, much of what you once valued in duality seems empty and illusory because it is, your love becomes abundant, unconditional and conscious, you can feel life, every form of life within you from the greatest to the least – there is now only one choice, which is to love, to understand, to have compassion for all life, whatever its form.

Here is a book, the Zen Teachings of Bodhidharma that helped me understand my personal journey to the light – perhaps it might help others on their journey!

A difficult revelation of conditional “love” is the judgement, perhaps disrespect , contempt or worse that it brings.

Perhaps no one at your home was able in a simple act of compassion or empathy to think beyond themselves and their attachments and ask how you were … for me, I guess that is the true expression of the experience – their ego driven actions, their true selfishness..

It’s a given, that no one has the right in being purposefully cruel for any reason.

If you have many obstacles in your path … consider, perhaps the Universe is trying to tell you something – perhaps that the path you are on, is not your path … be sure it is … for being on the wrong path and through your actions, you can generate Karma …

“As a man himself sows, so he himself reaps; no man inherits the good or evil act of another man. The fruit is of the same quality as the action” – Mahabharata, xii.291.22

We are all accountable for our choices, as I have learnt personally – do not blame those you who hurt you, for they are only instruments of Karma – Karma holds us all accountable for our behaviour in particular our actions towards others – how Karma will choose to balance the scales for the actions of others towards you and other life forms, is not for myself or others to speculate how. Alternatively, you may have chosen to be an instrument of someone else’s Karma.

I can feel only love and compassion for you all, if any truly wish non-judgmental spiritual help, then come find me … and we will work towards the light together, if you’re not up for that, no problem, find another, for when it is your turn you will journey to the light in this life or another, it is a journey we will all make. By staying attached to the illusions of this world, once can never be truly happy, because in being attached we are never truly free – and true happiness comes in freedom.

After a four-year journey on this experience, I have moved onto other things strengthened and enriched, you are each on your own, except of course for the infinite love and power of the Universe that is within each of you, but I am going to project my beliefs and say – your perception was that I was the problem however I believe I was a solution – fear itself is the problem.

I am thinking of you all as I write these words … face your fears … they are paper tigers … empty illusions. Judgment and blame separates us … the desire to control others comes from ego and fear and not taking your own responsibility for your part in an experience – controlling others controls you – instead stay present, be mindful and accept and flow … there is no way around pain or fear, the only way out is through.

Open your heart to those in need, do not make assumptions. You are not a judge, you are a coach, and in the future you may just be the guide that makes all the difference to someone else’s life.

There are two main motivators in life, love and fear. Choose wisely!